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The Survivor's Nest - Valentine's Day

Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do... but how much love we put in that action. Mother Teresa

Because Valentine's Day is right around the corner, it's time to talk about love. The obvious Valentine's Day symbols - hearts, flowers, chocolates - aren't bad in their place. I've always been happy to receive them. But, what about making your expressions of love more personal and heartfelt?

There's a saying in my house that goes like this, "It's the little things." Mostly my husband says it, and usually in response to my request that he be a bit more romantic. He's not a gushy romantic kind of guy (I've never known any guy who was, but I've heard they exist.) What he is is a man who has stood next to me through miscarriages, infertility, cancer and various family crisis. But back to the little things.....

For the past 24 years, my husband has brought me tea in bed every Saturday morning. He offers to run a bath for me when I'm stressed. He makes homemade "gravy" (that's Italian for tomato sauce) so we can have macaroni and gravy as a family every Sunday night. He loves my cooking and never complains when once in a while a new recipe goes horribly wrong. Every morning he asks me to pick out his tie, as I have done since we got married. 

Today, in honor of my husband, who has been my Valentine for the past 26 years, I want to start focusing on the little things. As a wife and mother, it seems like I'm always doing something for somebody, so a lot of it just becomes work. Could living Mother Teresa's words elevate everyday chores into sublime expressions of love? And, if so, wouldn't that fill my nest with the healing comfort of love? 

And what about our larger home - our communities and our earth? We are all survivors of something and we all deserve a safe and nurturing nest. By extending our loving actions out into the world, we help make that a reality.

Life is made up, not of great sacrifices or duties, but of things, in which smiles and kindness, and small obligations given habitually, are what preserve the heart and secure comfort. Humphry Davy

Or, as my husband always tells me, "It's the little things."

Survival > Existence,

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Comments

Renn's picture

Great post Debbie! Lovely Mother Teresa quote. And a lovely valentine to your husband! It really is the little things. Thanks for reminding us.

Debbie's picture

Renn:

My pleasure and thank you! Have a wonderful pre-Valentine's Day weekend!

Survival > Existence,

Debbie

Luci Weston's picture

Simply beautiful! You are a lucky woman, and your husband obviously knows how lucky he is, too, & that you have each other. :)

Debbie's picture

Hi Luci!

One of the many gifts of my cancer was a deeper understanding of how lucky we were to have each other. It's a good thing to remember on Valentine's Day and everyday!

Survival > Existence,

Debbie

Paul's picture

...in a nice way.

It's tough just now. At home (kids growing up and their needs for 'Taxi Dad'), at work (demands from bosses and an impending restructure), illness in extended family, and me going through tests for a non-life threatening and common but incurable stomach condition, and just the pressure of running a household in the run-up to Christmas.

There seems very little time for me, and even less for my wife and I as a couple. Late night dinners grabbed in front of the television seem to be the highlight of our life at the moment.

But "it's the little things" that I need to remember. Cups of tea, making my wife's lunch, or whatever just reminds her that I'm still here.

Thank you.

Debbie's picture

Hi Paul:

You're very welcome and thank you. Life is full of all kinds of struggles which make us forget sometimes how lucky we are to just "be." Enjoy the little things with your wife and all my best wishes to both of you.

Survival > Existence,

Debbie

 

 

 

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